Kesha, Did I Misjudge You?

I wrote a blog about Ke$ha (does she still stylize her name that way?) in 2013 I wrote a blog about how much I really didn't like her music, mostly based on the flippant attitude toward sexuality that she took in virtually every song. As a mom of girls, I'm constantly aware that pop culture icons can have a big impact on my kids, so I choose to limit their exposure to things that I think could be detrimental to their self-image or their development into strong, intelligent, discerning women of character. Kesha, I determined, was the antithesis to everything I wanted my girls to be.

no woman should have to go through this #FreeKesha pic.twitter.com/4MBXG7sC3h

— Houssein (@CheekyHoussein) February 19, 2016

Shortly after that she sort of faded from the forefront of the music scene, and I just assumed she must be taking a break to enjoy her wealth, since I hadn't heard of any unsuccessful albums being dropped. Turns out I was wrong about that. I read an article on Mashable that revealed that Kesha has been in a legal battle to get out of her contract with her producer "Dr. Luke" (who presumably received his doctorate from the same institution as Dr. Dre). Kesha alleged in court that Dr. Luke had been sexually harassing her, assaulting her and threatening her since he brought her to fame out of obscurity at the age of 18. (She is now 28).

Astonishingly, the courts upheld her contract and are forcing her to continue to work with and for her alleged abuser to make six more albums. Dr. Luke countersued for defamation of character, stating that this whole thing is a charade to get out of her recording contracts.

This is a tough case. On one hand, as a woman, I never want to disbelieve another woman when she says she has been abused or raped. I am inclined to immediately believe and want to offer help. On the other hand, artists making false allegations and suing to get out of unprofitable contracts is not unheard of in the recording industry. Another thing that is not unheard of in the recording industry though, is older, powerful men taking advantage of young women who desperately want to be famous and will put up with a lot of crap for it.

I am pretty sure Kesha is telling the truth on this one for the main reason that she's not seeking money in the suit, just dissolution of contract, and was even willing to work with another producer within the Sony record label. It's hard to look at those things and still think this is all about money.

Now, based on my previous blog, you might think that this is where I start finger wagging and saying that Kesha's loose morals is what led her to this situation. No. No. No. No victim blaming. It doesn't matter if she walked around mostly naked like Miley Cyrus, or slept with a million men, no one deserves to be raped, abused or made to feel worthless. I feel horrible for Kesha, and I wonder what kind of music she would make if she were not being hindered by a toxic relationship with her producer. Whatever kind of music she makes after escaping the clutches of this man, I still might not like or approve of it. But my taste in music notwithstanding, she deserves a chance to be unhindered by an abusive producer.

You can read more details about the lawsuit on Rolling Stone.

Ke$ha Don't Give Two F*%#$ But I Do.

I see you in the club showin' Ke$ha loveAin't trippin' on them bitches that be hatin'Catch a dub, chuckin' deucesYa'll hating's uselessIt's such a nuisanceYa'll chickens keep your two centsAnd keep your dollars, keep your lootI'm fresher than that GucciThem boys, they want my coochieI say no, I'm no hootchieYour homegirl hatin', I say who she?Ke$ha don't give two fucksI came to start that ruckusAnd ya wanna party with usCause we crazy mothafuckas

Read more: KESHA - CRAZY KIDS LYRICS 
It's clear from these lyrics that Ke$ha don't give two f*cks if I don't like her or her music, and I'm sure some of my friends will write this blog off as slut shaming but the fact is I am raising two daughters in a society that tells us through every medium that they are lust objects solely meant to give pleasure to men. It's one thing for them to be hearing this from men but for women like Ke$ha and Nikki Minaj to be perpetuating this falsehood makes it really hard for me to raise strong, independent women who don't feel like they need to use their physical assets to get ahead in life or to manipulate people in to giving them what they want.  

I was faced with this sexual inundation recently when I went shopping for work out clothes. I got extremely angry after a visit to Dick's Sporting Goods where I couldn't find any shorts that didn't threaten to show my butt or lady parts. I looked across the aisle at the men's running clothes and they all came down to their knees. Now, there was a time when I sported my daisy dukes in the summer, but as a married mother of two, I think Nike should make women's running shorts that don't show my ass cheeks. I just feel like there's something backwards about men being encouraged to be more modest than women, who are more vulnerable to rape and abuse. There are sick fucks men out there who have

actually claimed that a woman in short skirts or short shorts is "asking for it". Asking for it! If wearing short shorts is "asking for it", and sporting goods stores don't sell long running shorts, what are you supposed to do? I left without buying anything, and I run in my husband's basketball shorts, but that was not my preference.
The media, fashion designers and artists like Ke$ha make it very hard to even attempt to be modest and raise modest girls. I might applaud Ke$ha's effort here at asserting that she's "no hootchie" except that I can't stop laughing long enough to say it with a straight face. Pretty much every other hit she's had contains vulgar and graphic lyrics that proudly display her promiscuity. She has also partnered with the band 3OH!3 a couple of times. 3OH!3 represents the misogynistic other half of the Ke$ha lifestyle touting lyrics like "Hush girl, shut your lips, do the Hellen Keller, and talk with your hips,". 
Ke$ha's public persona is pretty much that of a woman who will take any guy who will stands still long enough for her to hop on. The strange duplicity of this (and Ke$ha is certainly not the only one, the worst one or the first one) is that these women try to turn sexism on its ear by asserting that using their genitalia to gain power is fighting fire with fire and somehow empowering to women. I assure you, it's not. It's the same old lie that has been told to women by men since the dawn of time, that they are merely a life support system for a vagina. For a woman to be preemptively using hers the same way a misogynist man would does not empower women at all, it further subjugates them. Ke$ha is a great example of this because at this point it's impossible to take her seriously when she tries (as she does in this song) to assert that she is more than just a polyamorous hedonist. 
This is why I like women like Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez. Sure, Taylor has been connected to more celebrities than IMDB, but she doesn't sing songs about slinging her lady parts around thereby glamorizing a profligate lifestyle to my child. Also, she hasn't made a sex tape! (Taylor if you ever make a sex tape I will cry). I like women who show my daughters that they can grow up to be successful women without having to shake what their mama gave em. I'm waiting for a time when we will realize that there is honor in modesty and women can be attractive without having to flaunt their sex appeal and arouse mens' desire. Until that time, I'm just going to have to keep my girls away from Ke$ha and her ilk.